Anarchy Parlor (2015)


REVIEWER RATING: 
8/10

DIRECTOR:

CAST:


Not sure how this little gem escaped my radar, but now I’m here to share the joy. Anarchy Parlor is like a festival for Eli Roth horror fans. Set in Lithuania and preying on the bougie rich-kid crowd on holiday, this should make all parents second guess their decisions to send their naive children overseas without practicing stranger danger.

If you are a follower of the underbelly feast for ink in a foreign country to capture your travel experience, then let me introduce you to “the Artist” (Robert LaSardo).

LaSardo is a mysterious and intimidating owner of an obscure tattoo parlor located in a seedy area off the heavy nightlife party crowd. As he himself is 90% tatted, it’s easy to see that his business is his everything. When the dutiful apprentice, Uta goes on the prowl at a wild dance club, she zones in on a group of American friends, tearing up the night frolicking, drinking and consuming drugs. Typical fearless students without worry…or street smarts. Once Uta chooses the handsome young Brock to bring back to the shop, his friend Amy follows in tow with the hopes of getting her first tattoo.

Hoping to commemorate this memorable trip abroad, The Artist immediately bonds with Amy’s energy and enthusiasm for life and cultural value put upon the ancient artistry of tattooing. Amy doesn’t heed any warnings deriving from the sinister smirks and spooky eyes on display from the talented LaSardo (which he has clearly perfected throughout years of incredible performances.) Her emphasis on selecting the perfect permanent tag is immortalized by the Artist who takes the utmost pride in every piece of skin he touches. Note this as a foreshadow for the wickedness that follows.

Unfortunately for both Brock and Amy, they have just walked into a house of horrors in the vibe of Hostel. Similar in tone, the entitled friends left behind soon sense a foreboding terror after a night of debauchery including threesomes and thoughtless hangovers. Faced with the realization that Brock and Amy ARE in trouble, eventually pulls them into the parlor where the evilness lurks beyond the storefront façade. And it is fantastically nasty.

Bloody, cruel and vicious, believe me…Anarchy Parlor is not for the squeamish. Even those with countless tattoos will think twice before going under the needle any time soon.

OVERALL: 
It’s a great honor to be tattooed. I accept that as one who has no ink, and no plans for such in the future. This art is a customary representation to mark yourself with a badge of cultural signification, and who better than an expert to perform such a momentous experience, right? Once again, LaSardo’s connection through masterful expression, levels up his role that influences Amy’s faith in her friends under an ultimate act of betrayal. When his soft spot for her becomes a delegation which shocks her to the core, Amy pulls strength from her new teachings and jumps forward into an unknown destiny. It’s fun, it’s gory and it’s not to be overlooked.


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