My expectations for this horror comedy were very high, and I'm still disappointed by what it failed to deliver—humor! None whatsoever! I was hoping for something reminiscent of a Scream-style Halloween slasher. Instead, I viewed a formulaic thriller that lacked originality or a script capable of providing a few laughs which I was craving.

Another sleepy suburban small town is celebrating its 300th birthday AND Halloween. Why? I still haven’t figured it out as the premise appears to place greater emphasis on the spooky holiday over the celebratory commemoration of the founders of this region. So why even include this irrelevant birthday at all?

Pretty blonde Hadley returns to her hometown after a wicked attack a year ago from her ex-boyfriend Kurt almost ended her life. She is greeted with open arms by her former school crew: best girl Payton, long-haired Adam, eccentric Dacey, and athlete Kagan, whose renewed friendship blossoms into a romance.

Before I proceed, it’s important to mention that many of these teens have VIP status: Very Important Parents. Payton’s mom is the high school principal. Mitchell (another non-descript classmate) is the son of a mayoral candidate. Finally, Kagan’s father, who serves as the current mayor, uses his position to ensure that all festivities proceed as scheduled, despite ongoing incidents in which a murderer is transforming victims into Halloween decorations. This makes me wonder which is more tasteless: the public display of dead bodies, or Mayor West’s willingness to maintain the illusion of a thriving and joyous city without any hesitation. Still, no laughter, jokes or anecdotes dropped anywhere although there is plenty of openings for a riotously crude wisecrack. Where is John Waters when you need him?

This is NOT your typical teen-scream slasher flick.
No.
It’s way worse.  

While the corpses pile up and Hadley’s notion that Kurt has returned to finish her off after the “accidental prank” from last year, we no longer wonder who is creating this carnage. Now, we want to know why! The situation remains ambiguous, and continued concerns—such as providing the police with inaccurate information regarding the events between Hadley and her former partner just failed miserably. The story is weak, the characters are undeveloped and there is little to no empathy for any victims who are stabbed, mutilated or decapitated by the lunatic who runs amok in an assortment of Halloween costumes. Even this masked maniac has no definitive aspects to set himself apart from any other psycho on the street.

When you add in the bullshit bureaucracy surrounding suspicions of Kagan for instance, there are still no climatic moments that register whether he may or may not be the murderer. Frankly, I don’t care. During the Halloween dance/corn maze which were NOT cancelled even though causalities were going to escalate, the “shocking reveal” at the end didn’t even cause me to shrug. By this time, it made no difference who the assailant is/was or could be. My investment in Happy Halloween was wasted, and I went to bed fully disappointed, unamused and bored.

With one exception…I’m not putting up decorations this year.